Sometimes, I have to sit back, take a deep breath, and forget all the frustrations and focus on the little things – the happy things.

Losing sight is easy – between 511 diaper changes, 6093 removals of toddler from high places or garbage cans or dog food or bathroom sink, wiping tears, listening to screams and whines and dealing with colic, hearing complaints and sibling disagreements, removing pet hair from every.single.thing I eat, if I actually find time to eat, trying to use the bathroom or shower with no fewer than one extra person, wondering if the laundry will ever get all washed, folded, AND put away, remembering to wash floors but never finding the time to do them day after day, cleaning up baby barf from my hair and shoulders on a regular basis – longing for that shower by myself that rarely seems to come, and just doing all that I can to survive the day with everyone in on piece and put to bed with an extra hug and kiss and knowing that they are loved – despite any craziness they may have encountered from me throughout the day.

Creating a run-on sentence like that takes SERIOUS focus.

At the end of the day, when my head hurts and my arms are weak from holding my precious loves all day, when my eyes just want to slam shut, and I’m not even sure that I can climb the stairs and into my bed, I look back on the things that made me smile and laugh and be so happy to be a mama.

*extra “I love you’s”
*milk drunk smiles
*ice cream bucket hats
*messy pizza face
*teeny tiny fauxhawk
*silly belly laughs
*picking up too many matchbox cars that make cute toddler noises
*chubby cheeks
*curled up baby legs
*baby back arched stretches
*the hot dog dance
*big blue eyes
*lotsa hugs
*daughters that bring home fast food for dinner so I don’t have to cook
*laughing until we cry
*sharing chocolate chip cookies
*sweet smelling baby head
*lashes that go on for days
*the quiet of bedtime and a few minutes to have just to myself to appreciate all of the chaos that was today and to look forward to doing it all again tomorrow.

I extra big love this quite time. I can clear my head a little bit, finish up a few things that got started and never finished, but mostly, I get to look at their angel faces and be so proud of the little people that I’ve made. One day there will be no more diapers, no chubby hands to wash, no sibling squabbles, and no toys to step on. When the kids have all grown and moved on to the rest of their lives, I will look back on days like today and not remember the frustration and the tears, I will be filled with love and joy for having such amazing moments to fill my days. I am so fortunate to be a mama that can stay home to be with her babies. I appreciate James every day for being an excellent provider and supportive dad and partner.

We are so blessed.